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    The Odyssey: A Stage Version

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    You’re as lucky as they are, sir. You’re close to yours.

      ODYSSEUS

      Islands weary me now. Foam is flecking this head.

      ELPENOR

      A clean white bed is all a man asks for on earth.

      (ODYSSEUS taps the mast.)

      ODYSSEUS

      I think of that olive tree my bed was made from.

      ELPENOR

      Aye, sir.

      ODYSSEUS

      And those stars flying. Embers from my hearth.

      ELPENOR

      Captain?

      ODYSSEUS

      No night was so long. No dawn more welcome.

      ELPENOR

      No.

      (Below deck.)

      STRATIS

      Once, it was off Smyrna, I cut a captain’s throat.

      TASSO

      Like a sheep.

      STRATIS

      Right, he bored me. Kept bleating of home.

      TASSO

      That’s his drift, isn’t it?

      STRATIS

      Home’s just another threat.

      COSTA

      So you’re stuck with killers of sheep, shepherd. Welcome.

      (ODYSSEUS descends from the upper deck with a lantern, tours the crew. Boatswain’s mattock is beating.)

      ODYSSEUS

      By dawn’s edge, Ithaca. By star-rise, my own roof.

      STRATIS

      Been how many seasons since you left home, Captain?

      ODYSSEUS

      Twenty. The sea air smells friendlier.

      STRATIS

      Could get rough.

      ODYSSEUS

      When sunrise comes, I’ll give the dawn back her lantern.

      COSTA

      ‘Home’! The word that a gull cries over wild waters.

      ODYSSEUS

      I’ve a boy I haven’t seen for half of my life.

      TASSO

      They’ve shot up like pliant saplings, my two daughters.

      STRATIS

      For me, home is a breathing death. Back to the wife.

      (Laughter.)

      ODYSSEUS

      These oars multiply the image of what we love.

      TASSO

      For me, home is grey fields with a ploughman’s fire.

      COSTA

      Sometimes it’s a smell. I’m pierced by the scent of clove.

      TASSO

      A grime-streaked angel gesturing from its spire.

      STRATIS

      For me, Captain, a reef in the battering surf.

      COSTA

      Objects outlast us. Spice tins on a kitchen shelf.

      STRATIS

      Until he enters his own grave, sir, no man is safe.

      ODYSSEUS

      Then call me ‘No-man’, but your friendship is my wealth.

      (He climbs back up to the upper deck.)

      STRATIS

      What’ve you got from the sea? A fistful of silver.

      COSTA

      Or a school of flying fish, scattering like stars.

      STRATIS

      That’s the sum of it. You live off that forever.

      TASSO

      That bag Aeolus gave him. Whatever it was.

      STRATIS

      He’ll be up on that deck for a while. Where’s the bag?

      COSTA

      He stuffed it under his bunk.

      STAVROS

      Will he be killed?

      STRATIS

      He’s made his fortune, Stavros. No sharing the swag.

      TASSO

      He’s made a pile from the war. Gold cups, coins, that shield.

      STRATIS

      I’m going down. Tap three times if he comes.

      (Upper deck.)

      ODYSSEUS

      Oh, the kings I’ve known, who saw themselves as fixed stars!

      ELPENOR

      What kings, sir?

      ODYSSEUS

      My far comrades at Troy.

      ELPENOR

      But their fame?

      ODYSSEUS

      They were meteors, in their long fall from greatness.

      ELPENOR

      Why?

      ODYSSEUS

      That sea simplifies them, Elpenor. To foam.

      (He is peeing over the side.)

      ELPENOR

      How can you keep your balance, without tumbling off?

      ODYSSEUS

      Feet braced. I’m steady, helmsman. It’s those stars that aren’t.

      ELPENOR

      They’re swaying like scales. Can you do that when it’s rough?

      ODYSSEUS

      Stars! Look! the sprinkled urine of the firmament!

      ELPENOR

      Day will break soon. A dawn breeze soothing the mind.

      ODYSSEUS

      Those waves are leaves in my garden …

      ELPENOR

      Sounds a nice place.

      ODYSSEUS

      And on the lawn over which a hunched oak towers.

      ELPENOR

      Would you care to sit down, Captain? I’ll make some space.

      ODYSSEUS

      My stone bench anchored in a foam of white flowers.

      (Lightning.)

      ELPENOR

      There, sir, through that crack of light on the horizon!

      ODYSSEUS

      They’re just the distant flashes of a summer storm.

      ELPENOR

      Wait now, sir! Where pronged lightning forks the sea’s garden?

      ODYSSEUS

      What, boy?

      ELPENOR

      You knelt there, pruning flower beds of foam.

      ODYSSEUS

      Your watch ends when?

      ELPENOR

      Sunrise, sir.

      ODYSSEUS

      I’ll believe you if …

      ELPENOR

      If what, sir?

      ODYSSEUS

      If you’ll admit to wine on your breath.

      ELPENOR

      Well, me and the crew had a jar earlier, sir.

      ODYSSEUS

      Steer carefully. A cloud can harden to a cliff.

      (Below deck.)

      COSTA

      Open the knot.

      STRATIS

      There’s nothing in there, just wind.

      TASSO

      You’re lying.

      STAVROS

      It’s getting dark suddenly, why?

      TASSO

      Get up and look again, clod! Up, under, behind!

      COSTA

      What’s that noise? It’s like windmills churning up the sky?

      ODYSSEUS

      They’ve opened the bag. Now the seas are mountainous.

      ELPENOR

      Look! White sheep scattering from the fork of that storm!

      ODYSSEUS

      Something has injured this sea. It’s breaking our oars.

      (Sound of breaking oars.)

      COSTA

      They’re cracking like bones in a dog’s teeth.

      ODYSSEUS (To ELPENOR)

      WATCH THAT STERN!

      ELPENOR

      There’s sunrise. Ithaca! A pink cloud and mountain!

      (Sunrise.)

      ODYSSEUS

      HARD WITH THAT HELM!

      STRATIS

      Ay! The blue’s turning greener where shallows begin.

      ELPENOR

      ITHACA, CAPTAIN! LET’S KNEEL DOWN ON DECK! YOU’RE HOME!

      ODYSSEUS

      THE HELM, DAMN YOU, BOY! Seagulls, the first fishermen.

      (The ship lists sharply.)

      COSTA

      The island is tilting and that white mountain town.

      ELPENOR

      THE GULLS ARE THROWING THEIR CAPS IN THE AIR, CAPTAIN!

      ODYSSEUS

      HOLD ON TO THE BLOODY HELM, BOY, OR WE’LL ALL DROWN!

      STRATIS

      Where is it, Skipper?

      ODYSSEUS

      Home! Poplars! Mount Neriton!

      (ELPENOR is swept overboard.)

      COSTA

      HELMSMAN OVERBOARD, CAPTAIN!

      ODYSSEUS

      Where’s Achilles’ shield? Gone?

      FIRST SAILOR

    &nbs
    p; CAPTAIN, THAT WAS THE HELMSMAN!

      ODYSSEUS

      WE’RE BLOWING OFF COURSE!

      STAVROS

      You unknotted this wind! We are gone forever.

      COSTA

      We’re lost sheep, Stavros.

      ODYSSEUS

      ELPENOR! TELEMACHUS!

      (The ship founders. All hands swept overboard.)

      SCENE VI

      Cries, gulls or girls playing. A ball bounces across the sand. A girl, ANEMONE, chases it out of sight. A screech. ANEMONE runs back to join NAUSICAA and another girl, CHLOE.

      ANEMONE

      I seen him, I seen him, the Old Man of the Sea!

      NAUSICAA

      Oh, girl, speak properly, and run back for my ball!

      ANEMONE

      Face down embracing the surf; please, please, believe me.

      NAUSICAA

      You saw a log with arms, don’t get hysterical.

      ANEMONE

      I’m not hysterical!

      CHLOE

      I’ll bet he was naked.

      NAUSICAA

      Why do you always ruin our games with nonsense?

      ANEMONE

      Beg pardon, Princess.

      CHLOE

      She’s just got men in her head.

      NAUSICAA

      That’s all you saw, girl. The dream of your secret sins.

      ANEMONE

      He was spraggled face down like a starfish! Naked!

      CHLOE

      Maybe a starfish is the Old Man of the Sea.

      NAUSICAA

      Or an octopus now, playing ball with eight hands.

      ANEMONE

      Why don’t you fetch the ball, if you don’t believe me?

      CHLOE

      ’Cause she didn’t throw it!

      ANEMONE

      A starfish! Without no pants!

      (ODYSSEUS appears, torn, naked, carrying the ball. The two girls scream and run. ODYSSEUS throws the ball, collapses.)

      NAUSICAA

      Please get up, sir, don’t lie on my kingdom naked.

      ODYSSEUS

      The sea has beaten me. My sight’s not too clear.

      NAUSICAA

      You should put something on. This is very awkward.

      ODYSSEUS

      White cries rose behind these rocks. A wave rolled me here.

      NAUSICAA

      Oh, did the reef tear you? What happened to that arm?

      ODYSSEUS

      I was spun like driftwood by those smoking breakers.

      NAUSICAA

      That’s the white, wild side of the island. Here it’s calm.

      ODYSSEUS

      I woke to hear seagulls crying. They were girls’ cries.

      NAUSICAA

      There was a wild storm last night, the oaks were groaning.

      ODYSSEUS

      I survived it. Swinging from a branch like a bat.

      NAUSICAA

      Still, after hurricanes there’s the light of morning.

      ODYSSEUS

      Upside down, over the surf. Hearing the storm beat.

      NAUSICAA

      That’s rough.

      ODYSSEUS

      O Nymph, whose freshness is sheer perfection!

      NAUSICAA

      Sheer? You’ll gain nothing addressing me in that way.

      ODYSSEUS

      I am dazzled. My salt eyes are scorched by the sun.

      NAUSICAA

      That’s how all these overtures start. With poetry.

      ODYSSEUS

      What poetry?

      NAUSICAA

      You know. ‘O Nymph’, and all that business.

      ODYSSEUS

      I thought I drowned and soared with the gulls to heaven.

      NAUSICAA

      See? Next you’ll croak about clutching my shining knees.

      ODYSSEUS

      I will?

      NAUSICAA

      Why not just say it?

      (Pause.)

      Or think it, even?

      ODYSSEUS

      No.

      NAUSICAA

      Or talk about my eyes, like sea-green shallows.

      ODYSSEUS

      Yes. They are. You’re right.

      NAUSICAA

      Or the pink shells of my ears?

      ODYSSEUS

      Nymph, I’ll say no more than my nakedness allows.

      NAUSICAA

      Why?

      ODYSSEUS

      Because there’s a huge gulf between us, girl. Years!

      NAUSICAA

      Don’t bark at me like some seal! You know what you are?

      ODYSSEUS

      No.

      NAUSICAA

      A snarling, whiskered seal sunning on some reef.

      (She mimics a seal.)

      ODYSSEUS

      Oh, am I?

      NAUSICAA

      Blaming me for your catastrophe.

      ODYSSEUS

      You’re well on your way to being somebody’s wife.

      NAUSICAA

      Yours?

      ODYSSEUS

      No. I’m too old. Plus, I have one already.

      NAUSICAA

      Too old, with that panelled body? Old is like this.

      (Crouches, clutching her back.)

      ODYSSEUS

      You’re an old man’s delight.

      NAUSICAA

      Shall we meet properly?

      ODYSSEUS

      Shall we?

      NAUSICAA

      Nausicaa. And you’re my gift from the seas!

      (She kisses his cheek. A roar.)

      ODYSSEUS

      What’s that noise in the throat of those hills?

      NAUSICAA

      Oh. The games.

      ODYSSEUS

      The games? What games?

      NAUSICAA

      You’ll see. When I get you some clothes.

      ODYSSEUS

      I’ve heard that cheering echo. Spears, hoisting dead names.

      NAUSICAA

      You’re in tears.

      ODYSSEUS

      More salt. For Elpenor. Troy’s heroes.

      (He stops. Listens.)

      NAUSICAA

      Were you a hero, too? Why are you stopping? Move.

      ODYSSEUS

      Every fuming breaker brings echoes of that war.

      NAUSICAA

      What war?

      ODYSSEUS

      Exactly.

      NAUSICAA

      It took you from those you love?

      ODYSSEUS

      Twenty years now.

      NAUSICAA

      Come. You’ll tell it to my father.

      (They climb.)

      ODYSSEUS

      Who’s he, your father?

      NAUSICAA

      He’s the king of this place.

      ODYSSEUS

      I lost ship, crew, a shield. I have nothing left.

      NAUSICAA

      We’ll find them, I promise. I’m a real princess.

      ODYSSEUS

      I could tell.

      NAUSICAA

      Liar.

      ODYSSEUS

      I could. From the way you laughed.

      (ANEMONE and CHLOE peer out, stop, advance. ODYSSEUS walks ahead of NAUSICAA.)

      NAUSICAA

      The map of the world’s on your back. The skin’s peeling.

      ODYSSEUS

      Sun and salt. For ten long years. What are your friends’ names?

      NAUSICAA

      Girls. This is Scheria, an isle known for healing.

      ODYSSEUS

      By three gracious spirits.

      NAUSICAA

      And famous for its games.

      (Distant cheering, louder. They exit.)

      SCENE VII

      Alcinous’ palace. ATHLETES and COURTIERS exercising. Music. Trumpets. Cheering. ALCINOUS steps on to a platform. Drums and horns. BILLY BLUE as PHEMIUS.

      BILLY BLUE (Sings)

      Fleet the bare feet of runners racing on the sand!

      Their ankles whirr like hummingbirds towards the laurel.

      Extending their arms like swallows as they reach the end,

      Their th
    ighs are blurred ovals passing breakers of coral.

      What greater glory than what men win on their feet,

      Outdistancing friendly shadows in their short sun?

      Greater than poetry is the metre of the athlete

      Since their glory is brief, and swifter than any song.

      They turn into birds, they are stretching to leave the earth,

      They’re pliant as otters, their heads sleek from the surf.

      But let them stay green as the Olympian laurel

      In the kindest of wars, the games, man’s happiest quarrel.

      Kindle the torch, begin these Phaeacian games,

      Then, on plaques of gold, silver and bronze incise their names.

      ALCINOUS

      First let us honour this shipwrecked stranger, our guest.

      (Roar.)

      ODYSSEUS

      Thanks, gentle Scherians. I’m enjoying it here.

      ALCINOUS

      In a while the games. He has accepted our test.

      (Laughter. Some booing.)

      ODYSSEUS

      Well, I’m a bit rusty. You’ve every right to jeer.

      (SECOND COURTIER enters the ring. Takes javelin, hurls it out of sight.)

      FIRST COURTIER

      That could nail an eagle. Out o’ sight, man, out o’ sight!

      SECOND COURTIER

      Here comes the runt now, he’s shorter than the spear.

      FIRST COURTIER

      Bet you he puts out the sun’s eye, turns day to night.

      SECOND COURTIER

      Bet you it drops like a swallow, tired of air.

      (ODYSSEUS hurls his javelin farther.)

      THIRD COURTIER

      Knock me down with a feather! That’s gone to Egypt!

      FOURTH COURTIER

      Send an expedition to find it. Heard that hum?

      FIRST COURTIER

      It sang like a swallow, man!

      SECOND COURTIER

      He’s lucky. It slipped.

      FOURTH COURTIER

      Yeah? You slip over to Egypt and bring it home.

      (ODYSSEUS confronts a YOUNG ATHLETE. ODYSSEUS and the YOUNG ATHLETE wrestle. ODYSSEUS lets himself be thrown.)

      ODYSSEUS

      I stopped because I imagined you were my son.

      YOUNG ATHLETE

      That’s a good one, I never heard that one before.

      ODYSSEUS

      I couldn’t hurt you.

      YOUNG ATHLETE

      Try, you have my permission.

      (ODYSSEUS throws him, pins him.)

      ODYSSEUS

      I keep seeing him. Telemachus. Elpenor.

      (Cheering. ALCINOUS calls for silence.)

      You see here a man who’s lost all his worldly goods.

      (General groan of sympathy.)

      Who the sea-god hates, but who’s survived every storm.

      (Applause.)

      Like a boar dodging the lightning-lances of gods.

      (Imitates a boar. Laughter.)

      A wanderer who knows your bounty will help him home.

      (Silence.)

      If you were simple men, I would tell you such things …

      FOURTH COURTIER

      We live on islands. We might believe them, try us.

      ODYSSEUS

      You are polished, sceptical men. My wanderings …

      FIFTH COURTIER

      Yes?

      ODYSSEUS

      Men used to hearing the surf curl in their ears.

     

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