Hide Your Crazy
Book 1 of The Kilgore Motorcycle Patrol Series
By
Lani Lynn Vale
Text copyright ©2019 Lani Lynn Vale
All Rights Reserved
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the author. The only exception is by a reviewer, who may quote short excerpts in a review.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Dedication
One day I’m going to get to the point where I know what to put here. I’m not there yet, though. Happy Mother’s Day.
If it’s not Mother’s Day when you’re reading this, it was here when I wrote this particular dedication, so that still counts, right?
Acknowledgments
Chase Ketron - Model
Golden Czermak - Photographer
Ellie McLove & Ink It Out Editing- My editors
Cover Me Darling - Cover Artist
My mom - Thank you for reading this book eight million two hundred times.
Kendra, Diane, Sarah, Kathy, Mindy, Barbara & Amanda—I don’t know what I would do without y’all. Thank you, my lovely betas, for loving my books as much as I do.
Table of Contents
Blurb
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Epilogue
Other titles by Lani Lynn Vale:
The Freebirds
Boomtown
Highway Don’t Care
Another One Bites the Dust
Last Day of My Life
Texas Tornado
I Don’t Dance
The Heroes of The Dixie Wardens MC
Lights To My Siren
Halligan To My Axe
Kevlar To My Vest
Keys To My Cuffs
Life To My Flight
Charge To My Line
Counter To My Intelligence
Right To My Wrong
Code 11- KPD SWAT
Center Mass
Double Tap
Bang Switch
Execution Style
Charlie Foxtrot
Kill Shot
Coup De Grace
The Uncertain Saints
Whiskey Neat
Jack & Coke
Vodka On The Rocks
Bad Apple
Dirty Mother
Rusty Nail
The Kilgore Fire Series
Shock Advised
Flash Point
Oxygen Deprived
Controlled Burn
Put Out
I Like Big Dragons Series
I Like Big Dragons and I Cannot Lie
Dragons Need Love, Too
Oh, My Dragon
The Dixie Warden Rejects
Beard Mode
Fear the Beard
Son of a Beard
I’m Only Here for the Beard
The Beard Made Me Do It
Beard Up
For the Love of Beard
Law & Beard
There’s No Crying in Baseball
Pitch Please
Quit Your Pitchin’
Listen, Pitch
The Hail Raisers
Hail No
Go to Hail
Burn in Hail
What the Hail
The Hail You Say
Hail Mary
The Simple Man Series
Kinda Don’t Care
Maybe Don’t Wanna
Get You Some
Ain’t Doin’ It
Too Bad So Sad
Bear Bottom Guardians MC
Mess Me Up
Talkin’ Trash
How About No
My Bad
One Chance, Fancy
It Happens
Castiel and Turner
Snitches Get Stitches
F-Bomb
KPD Motorcycle Patrol
Hide Your Crazy
It Wasn’t Me
I’d Rather Not
Make Me
Blurb
I’m kind of a lady, but definitely more of a weirdo.
Hearing the woman at the table behind him say that to her friend should’ve turned Logan Gibbs off.
It didn’t. In all honesty, it only made him listen harder.
He’s had enough weird in his life to last a lifetime. The last thing his complicated life needs is a woman in it who has no clue what color you get when you mix yellow and blue together.
Yet, her obvious blonde moments aren’t enough to deter him. Nor is her lack of finger-painting skills.
I’m a cop, not a miracle worker.
Hearing the man in the group behind her say that should’ve had Katy Roberts running away as fast as her feet would carry her. Katy’s father’s a cop, and it’s hard enough to live her life with Daddy trying to dictate her every move. She needs another cop in her life like she needs yet another thing to go wrong.
To add onto that, she can’t find a job, has no love life to speak of, and has to be the oldest known virgin in Kilgore, Texas.
Yet, when she sees his painting—a painting that resembles a piece of the male anatomy more than the lighthouse they were supposed to be painting—she knows that she has to give him a chance.
The very last thing the two of them expect is for her father and his boss to force them to marry after an eensy-weensy accident. An accident that, surprisingly, both of them want.
Prologue
I’m not sure where you learned to whisper, but my guess is in a helicopter surrounded by chainsaws.
-Logan’s secret thoughts
Logan
“This is a new venture for us,” the captain said. “It’s never been done before, and if I was being honest, I’m not sure it’s going to last. But there you go. Starting Monday, each of you will be on a motorcycle provided by the Kilgore Police Department while on patrol.”
My brows, along with those of the four other men surrounding me, went up.
“You won’t all be on shift at the same time, and this won’t be a nighttime thing. You will only be on duty during the daylight hours due to the high motorcycle fatality rate after six in the evening.”
My jaw clenched.
That was truer than true.
“Pace, Justice, Lock.” The captain held out my paper. “Logan.”
“Did you happen to notice how all of our names are right there in the same part of the alphabet?” I asked. “No, just me?”
Every set of eyes belonging to the people that were sitting in the stupid little desks at my sides and behind me looked at me with various stages of annoyance.
“What?” I asked, genuinely curious. “I really feel left out of the cool club sometimes. Y’all always share these looks…”
Captain stood and walked to a box. “We got y
’all’s sizes from the uniform shop.” He grunted as he opened it with a pocket knife that he’d produced out of thin air. “If they don’t fit, take it back and they’ll have to order you a new pair. But get it done by Monday so they will arrive in time.”
And that’s when he started passing out little slips of fabric that didn’t look fit to be put on my ten-year-old niece.
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” I said as I held up the uniform. “This isn’t fuckin’ Chips, Captain,” I growled. “This is real life!”
Captain Morgan (yes, that really was his name) gave me a droll look.
“This is the exact uniform that LAPD uses, as well as the California Highway Patrol. They’re proven safer when they’re tight. Nothing to get caught up on while you’re on the motorcycle. Tougher fabric to protect you in case of an accident.”
“Yeah, and you’ll see every single goddamn cock hair that I have,” I grumbled.
The men at my back chuckled, but the captain wasn’t amused.
“Gibbs,” Captain said. Uh-oh, he’d pulled out my last name. Shit was getting real. “You can take it or leave it. Just know that leaving it means that you’ll be leaving the job as well.”
I sighed. “I’ll take it.”
If I got to get paid to ride motorcycles all day, then I’d take it all day, every day. Even if I did look like an extra straight out of Chips.
“What’s with the bright black stripper boots?” Justice asked. “Seriously?”
Captain Morgan growled.
“Listen, ladies,” he snapped. “I’m not answering any more questions about the uniform. Wear it. Fucking like it. And stop fucking bitching.”
“It’s not too bad.”
The door pounded open again, and a large man by the name of Jonah Crew, aka Tickey, lumbered in.
He didn’t talk. He didn’t make pleasantries. In fact, he was the biggest dick on the entire force.
He’d joined the department a few months ago at his brother’s urging, and had quickly taken to the job.
I didn’t see anything similar when you compared my friend, Lachlan Downy, to Jonah. Both men were large, sure, but they didn’t even act the same. Whereas Downy was a big ball of fun and an expert negotiator, Jonah was the complete opposite.
He was brash, rude, and I fucking loved him.
But I also hated him.
The man had a shit life when he was younger. Sure, I got that. But it didn’t mean that he could make everyone’s life a living hell.
He actually reminded me of Martin Riggs off of the old movie Lethal Weapon. Full of piss and vinegar, and he pretty much got off on pissing people off just because he could.
He was a loaded time bomb, just waiting to detonate, and nobody knew when and where he was going to go off.
Now, Downy’s son, Lock, who was also a member of our new band of merry men, was a lot like his father. Downy Sr. and Downy Jr. were definitely cut from the same cloth. I liked and respected both men equally the same.
“Nice of you to join us, Crew,” Captain said. “Have a seat. Would you like to comment about the uniform as well?”
Jonah shook his head once and then stared blankly ahead.
The captain sighed and continued explaining our duties, finally ending a half an hour later when our shifts would end.
“You’ll work a rotating shift. Any given shift you’ll be working with three other motorcycle cops, and they’ll be different each shift, so don’t bother making plans from one week to the next. We’ll put you where we need you, but mostly you’ll be cruising through our busiest roads to help enforce traffic laws, and also give the other boys more time to respond to other calls.” He paused. “Any questions?”
Nobody said a word.
“All right then. Just remember…this is your last chance. No more fuck-ups, y’all.” He stood up. “New schedules will be posted tomorrow. You’ll start this next week after the rest of the equipment arrives. Okay?”
Nobody said anything again.
“Good.” He got up and left the room.
Jonah went out right on his heels, leaving the rest of us staring at our shiny motorcycle boots and tight ass pants.
“This is a fuckin’ nightmare.”
That came from Justice as he held up the pants.
“Amen to that,” I grunted and stood. “We free to leave now?”
They all shrugged.
“Good enough answer for me,” I grumbled, standing up.
Kilgore Police Department was a fairly good size, but at this time in the evening, it was dead quiet due to shift change. The only person that was making any noise in the entire place was the 911 operator that worked in her own little room off to the side of the bullpen.
Normally there were three of them, but likely since it was shift change, the other two had taken their lunches.
“All right, Logan,” I heard called from behind me. “You try that on for us, model it, and we’ll tell you what we think.”
I gave Pace a look.
“Fuck you.”
But before we could all make the break for it that we should’ve done the moment that Captain Morgan left the room, he was back just as fast. “Oh, don’t forget. We have a team building exercise at the goddamn painting place. If I have to be there, you have to be there. And make sure someone finds fucking Jonah and tells him to be there or else. Eight o’clock, sharp. It’s also BYOB—bring your own goddamn beer. And make double damn sure that you bring your own because you’re not drinking mine.”
Pace and I shared a look. “Not it.”
The fact that we both said it at the same time was highly amusing.
“I’m not telling him,” Pace grumbled. “He’s going to shit himself at hearing we have to go to a fucking painting party.”
“Just make his nephew do it,” I suggested, looking over at the fresh-faced Baby Downy who’d been out of the police academy for all of six weeks.
He was the only one of us who’d gotten to this particular unit out of want rather than necessity.
The rest of us, Jonah, Pace, Justice, and I had all gotten here because we’d gotten into a bit of a tight spot with something or another over the last couple of months. And since we had a new therapist who felt that maybe a change of pace/scenery would benefit us, we’d all been transferred to a unit that was pretty much a precursor to being fired.
Which none of us wanted, but we didn’t really have much of a choice seeing as the goddamn therapist was the daughter of the mayor, and what that woman wanted, that woman got. Regardless of the fact that none of us had done a goddamn thing wrong other than find ourselves in that woman’s office.
“Downy looks like he would do it,” Pace agreed. “Let’s go talk to him.”
***
“Ummm,” Pace said as he stood next to me, bouncing on the prosthetic blades that acted as stand-ins for his actual feet. “Nobody is here yet.”
I nodded my head at the lot. “I’m fairly sure that Justice has been here for about twenty minutes, but he’s parked over there in the shadows because he’s too afraid he’ll see his mom who is painting right now with a couple of her friends.”
Pace squinted and tried to see into the shadows but shook his head. “I can’t see him. But that’s funny.”
“It is,” I agreed. “She’s hot as hell for an older woman, right?”
Pace looked at the woman that was laughing her ass off with a glass of wine in her hand, looking like she wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. “He’ll kill you if he hears you say that about his mom. And, just sayin’, old man, but you’re not too far from her age.”
I scoffed. “I’m thirty-eight. Justice said his mom was in her fifties. That’s twelve whole years.”
Pace snorted. “Thirty-eight is old. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
I rolled my eyes. “Thirty-three is fairly old, too.”
“No, it isn’t,” he countered. “Thirty-five is old. I’m two years away from that.”
; Before we could continue our argument, a motorcycle pulled up containing Lock Downy.
“Now we’re only missing Jonah.” I laughed.
We both looked at Lock, who was removing his helmet.
“Did you tell your uncle to come?” I questioned him.
Lock nodded his head. “Yep. He said he’d be here.”
And he was.
Five minutes later, he rolled up on his motorcycle that looked like it was on its last leg.
None of us said a word.
“Everybody here?” Captain Morgan called from behind us.
I looked over my shoulder at him, just now realizing that Pace and I hadn’t been alone.
Where the fuck had he come from?
“Yeah,” I confirmed.
“Good,” he said, then cupped his hands over his mouth. “Justice, get your ass over here!”
“Captain Morgan,” a feminine, quiet hypnotic voice said from beside us. “Is that really necessary? Screaming the word ass across the parking lot? That’s not really good publicity seeing as you’re all representing the Kilgore Police Department.”
Captain Morgan snorted. “Yeah, sure.”
Ruby Rose, the department’s therapist that I wasn’t aware would be here tonight, just shook her head and in turn, stared us all down.
“Gentlemen,” she said sweetly.
Ruby Rose, despite her hooker name, really was a sweet woman.
She had long, black curly hair, a cute upturned nose that made her look adorable, and boobs for days.
She also had a major crush on the captain, as did the captain on her.
Though, neither one of them were willing to admit that.
Instead, they just offered each other snide comments here and there as they saw each other at work and outside of work, and it was a version of verbal foreplay that I knew one day would require them to act on their attraction or they’d internally combust.
Justice arrived with a scowl on his face.
“My mother is still in there,” he grumbled.
Justice was dressed in head to toe black, the only pop of color a red bandana holding his hair back.
“Your mother is going to love seeing you,” Ruby informed Justice.