Poetry Collection Three:
Interpersonal Transgressions
Written and published by Ashley Rebecca Kingston
All rights reserved.
No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic means
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Only exception being, is by a reviewer, who may quote short excerpts in a review.
Copyright © 2016 Ashley Rebecca Kingston
Published: November 24th 2016
ISBN: 9781370097197
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favourite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Authors Notes:
With my poetry anthologies I am finally putting together; I am trying to collect and create different themes, different emotions, and different stories. With hopes some can experience something different today than the day before, through someone else’s eyes.
The following poems are of my creation. My experiences, whether imagined or tactile in this reality. While a poem may be received and interpreted differently by different people, there are words and themes contained within these lines that some readers may find are not suitable for younger audiences.
Contents:
A Bee To A Flower - February.18.2013
Not Over Him - November.14.2001
Power Flows - November.29.2001
Sewn And Unknown - December.14.2001
Nonexistent - January.23.2002
Forgive Me - January.23.2002
Too Bad, Too Late - January.28.2002
Kissing - January.30.2002
Flirting - January.31.2002
O’Rion - February.02.2002
Falling Into - February.13.2002
Burning Inside - February.16.2002
What To Do - February.17.2002
Cold Hands - February.18.2002
If I Dared - February.22.2002
I Had Plans - May.20.2002
One Night - June.07.2002
Not Yet - June.10.2002
His Is Mine - June.14.2002
But He Held Me - June.14.2002
All Set - June.15.2002
No Just Kiss And Run - July.10.2002
To Need - July.26.2002
A Chance - July.29.2002
Dear Past Love - August.03.2002
More And More - August.10.2002
One - August.22.2002
X Thing - August.25.2002
Just My Friend - August.27.2002
Stupid List - September.08.2002
No Cares - September.12.2002
You'll Come Back To Me - September.20.2002
He’s Single Again - September.22.2002
No Beliefs Anymore - September.26.2002
Little Boy - September.27.2002
Love Hate Relationship - October.02.2002
Liking Her In That Way - October.18.2002
Hoping It Was More - October.18.2002
Ignoring Scared Man - October.21.2002
Deep Love - October.23.2002
Pain In My Discovery - October.24.2002
That Lyle-ing Man - October.27.2002
That Lyle-ing Man II - October.28.2002
No I Can Not - November.11.2002
For Sure - November.16.2002
Only One Way Out - December.14.2002
Pleasuring - January.01.2003
Wrap Around - January.05.2003
Washing - January.06.2003
Stupid Me Hurting - January.22.2003
I Danced Anyway - January.24.2003
Fine Line - January.30.2003
Why Do I Keep Stupidly Running - February.03.2003
Totally Flirting With Her - February.15.2003
My William - March.01.2003
Two Girls In Naivety - April.15.2003
A Fetish Thing - April.23.2003
I Tell You All - March.29.2004
A Bee To A Flower
February.18.2013
his words cling to my heart, like a bee to its flower
wanting more and more, even after he has had his fill
Not Over Him
November.14.2001
over him, i fall
i’d do anything, for him to even call
over him, i’ll never be
i’d do anything, for him to see
over him, i am not even me
i’d do anything, to just be
over him, I am nothing no more
i’d die right now, even if i’d be just sore
over him, i fall
i’d do anything, for him to even call
over him, i’ll never be
i’d do anything, for him to just see me
Power Flows
November.29.2001
The water flows, and I hold you inside… I need to feel you, I need to try and hide.
The feeling of drums, beating inside my chest… I need to feel your heart, beating harder inside.
The waters flow, I keep you inside… Because I know I’ll feel empty, without you in my mind.
The waters flow, I tightly hold you inside… I need to feel you, a yearning and aching in losing control.
Beating and flowing, harder yet so soft… Burning what is left, of my lonely insides.
Sewn And Unknown
December.14.2001
Lay her softly down, watch her curls flow about.
Feel her skin move, watch her eyelashes flutter.
The passion and power, igniting love not lust.
Over powers his groins, to have her he must.
The moment will last, seeds will be sewn.
So many things, left to be unknown.
Nonexistent
January.23.2002
I feel like I don’t exist
he hung up on me
I cried and tried to scream
it hurts to breathe
I know no one knows
I have no one to hold
I’ll just keep it all in
until I explode
I have so much to give
yet I am nonexistent
I’ll cry until I bleed
I wish I would not eat
I want to smash something
I almost wish I were dead
I don’t fucking exist
so why am I even here
why do I have to wake up
waking up to nothing each morning
just sitting and thinking
what we really are
why we can’t stay in love
and why I can’t have him
but who am I to think of him
and who am I to mourn for a year
who the fuck am I who loves him
and who am I to cry
who am I to weep on my pillow
who am I to not deny love
who am I to think I know what love is
it hurts to breathe
I need to be free of this
I need pills or alcohol
I think I need someone to help me
while I continue to disappear within
to be truly nonexistent
Forgive Me
January.23.2002
Hello my love… I whispered
as I walked right through your front door
c
razy boy as always it was unlocked…
Forgive my rude intrusion, I know I shouldn’t be here
but I have nowhere else to be
I didn’t look through your stuff
I’d never do that to you
I didn’t write you a letter
I didn’t even knock on your door
I know I always come uninvited
But would you forgive me my love
If I stood and danced in your room
Would you forgive me love… if I took off all my clothes
if I wrapped myself in your bathrobe and breathed you in deep
Would you forgive me love… if I fell asleep for a moment in your bed
if I just thought of you in every moment of every day since you left
But would you forgive me my love
I noticed a letter on your beside table
Would you forgive me love… for my fingers opened it up
my eyes saw the words that were neatly written inside
“I love you so my dear, see you later tonight…”
Would you forgive me love… I shouldn’t be here
the letter was not in my writing, and I know I shouldn’t be here
Forgive me love, for I wept in your shower…
for my tears on your bed, for ever entering your life
Forgive me love, for loving you so much
and for just wanting you to be happy…
But would you forgive me my love
for not leaving a note, for not leaving you alone
Would you forgive me love… for my tears on your pillow
Would you forgive me love… for I will always love you
Too Bad, Too Late
January.28.2002
It’s too bad, you’re too late, you’ve lost everything with me.
You’re way too late to realize your mistakes now, you stupid cruel man.
It’s too bad, you’re too late, you’ve lost everything we created.
It’s too fucking bad, you’re way too late to find me again.
You left without really saying goodbye
All I wanted was one last kiss farewell
I never did ask too much of you
But to break up with me in person
You fucking men, drive me fucking mad
I don’t ask for much but everything
You left without really saying goodbye
All I wanted was one last kiss farewell
I never did ask too much of you
I don’t ask for much but everything
Kissing
January.30.2002
light shining over us
... lips barely touching
voices quiet and slow
hands grasping onto
.. anything of each other
light shining over us
.. lips pressing against lips
hands holding onto
arms tightly wrapped around
.. our bodies lay intertwined
light shining somewhere
.. sparks shimmer when we touch
happiness when we smile
.. kissing means so much
I’ll never not be touched by you
Flirting
January.31.2002
flirting with my fingers
fluttering my eyelashes
fiddling and flipping my hair
flashing you my big smile
blushing at your starry glance
wondering if I am good enough
too shy to even say a word
wondering what your lips taste like
being careful that I eat gracefully
wondering if all you want is just sex
feeling cold underneath my dress
wondering what your hands would feel like
flirting with my fingers
fluttering my eyelashes
fiddling with my hair
flashing you my big smile
O’Rion
February.02.2002
My sweet shining stars up above me
I’ve loved you far too hard
But never will I ever forget
What our love really is inside
And who you really are sweet star
Is beyond the powers of this place
Dreams will lead you into your future
And memories of me will finally escape
My sweet shining stars above me
I’ve loved you for far too long
But I will never forget any of you
Or what your love has meant to me
My sweet shining cluster of stars
You light up my dark skies at night
I stand and I just stare at your giving love
For I’d love to be with you up above
My sweet shining stars up above me
I’ve loved you far too hard
But never will I ever forget
What our love really is inside
Falling Into
February.13.2002
falling in love
falling in lust
dying in bed
dying without trust
falling all over
what once was
lost in the shadows
lost not if i must
falling out of love
falling out of lust
asleep in my bed
lying in your dust
what there was once
is now not again
so much time
wasted with him
falling in love
falling in lust
dying in bed
dying without trust
falling all over
what once was
lost in the shadows
lost not if i must
Burning Inside
February.16.2002
burning inside my soul, inside my body he flows
inside of my own body, between my knees
he tightly grasps my hips, while he flows in the seas
taking that what there is, to try to make me his
I’d give anything to feel, him inside of me
but what do I do, when it all means more
this could be wrong, but I want to feel right
all in all, all of me is in plain sight
What To Do
February.17.2002
I do like him so much
The time that we’ve spent together
The interesting conversations
But I’ve talked to everyone,
and I know the trouble is his age,
otherwise I’d shut up about it and just jump in.
But what should I do…
When it could be wrong
I could perhaps be wrong
But I always feel wrong
But what should I do…
If I do like him so much
But his age is what is being talked about
But I really don’t care
If I do really like him
It’s my heart and my eyes,
is what he says he sees in me.
But I really don’t know…
What I can and can’t do
Like I’m a child having to follow rules
What do I do, when I could be wrong…
But being wrong isn’t the point
My point is he is a lot older
And that I do like him a lot
But there are boundaries around us
Cold Hands
February.18.2002
so warm but cold
his hands burn my skin
even if he is not near
and I try to see
anything but him
but I saw him caress
the table by my side
I had to look away
because my insides
turned and flipped into a knot
but he is all I have
for now until forever
to never find the end
I
have almost nothing
I crave to be with him
but I kick and fight all the way
with myself through his eyes
nothing really matters
but I have a lot to say
he is so hot to the touch
his body is not mine
he says he loves my eyes
I try to make him deny
but he is nice and knowledgeable
I like age but not more confusion
my hands are so cold
because I am unsure
as to what I should do
with fighting myself
so warm but cold
his hands burn me
and I try to see
anything but him
If I Dared
February.22.2002
If I dared to touch his hand, I fear I wouldn’t ever let go
If I dared to look him in his eyes, I fear I wouldn’t look away
If I dared to speak my mind, I know I’d just look like a fool
If I dared to care too much, I know I’d end up broken again
Just to know how stupid I am, to not leave well enough alone
I just don’t understand why I can’t let go, and just walk away
To forget or not even know, to just go on by myself
Why do I feel like I always need, someone else to live my life
I fear I wouldn’t ever let go
I fear I wouldn’t look away
I know I’d just look like a fool
I know I’d end up broken again
To dare to not assume my fate
I Had Plans
May.20.2002
I had plans to marry him
I had plans to make love to him
I had everything I am in him
You made my world stand still
You made me wish you ill
You made me fall in love with you